Marriage is a safeguarding issue
It is my growing belief that the church cannot credibly defend marriage unless it grapples with the perils inherent in […]
Marriage is a safeguarding issue Read Post »
Firelight, The church and consentThe church and consent
Is sex without consent still sex?
Your answer will depend on what you think sex actually is. And you’d be surprised how many different definitions are
Is sex without consent still sex? Read Post »
#metoo, Firelight, The church and consent
Why Love & Respect’s CHAIRS acronym isn’t about genuine respect
I show how the CHAIRS acronym, which Eggerichs uses as a reference for respect, is more about self-importance than self-worth.
Why Love & Respect’s CHAIRS acronym isn’t about genuine respect Read Post »
Firelight, The church and consent
On Dobson, domestic violence and DARVO dynamics
CONTENT NOTE: This post discusses the dynamics of domestic abuse and victim-blaming. A few years ago I was volunteering for
On Dobson, domestic violence and DARVO dynamics Read Post »
#churchtoo, Abuse dynamics, Firelight, The church and consent, The church and exclusion
“Be self-giving, not self-seeking” — but what if that’s the wrong marriage advice
I see the same essential marriage advice given time and time again: “be self-giving, not self-seeking”. Depending on who you
“Be self-giving, not self-seeking” — but what if that’s the wrong marriage advice Read Post »
Firelight, The church and consent
On consent for sex in the middle of the night
A video of this post is also available on Facebook. The middle of the night is not usually a good
On consent for sex in the middle of the night Read Post »
Sunlight, The church and consent
On wives ‘depriving’ their husbands of sex because she ‘doesn’t feel like it’
This post is a response to another Christian blogger who I hope you haven’t heard of. I’ve made two videos
On wives ‘depriving’ their husbands of sex because she ‘doesn’t feel like it’ Read Post »
Sunlight, The church and consent
Consent means communicating if something’s not going to plan (in a context of mutual trust)
When it comes to sex, “consensual” isn’t the same as “no mistakes.” Sure, consensual means no big, life-changing mistakes. It
Sex and Consent: How does that work in a long-term relationship?
Photo credit: sasint from pixabay I originally wrote this post for abuse advocate Ashley Easter and you can find it
Sex and Consent: How does that work in a long-term relationship? Read Post »
Sunlight, The church and consent
“But if I have not consent…” A short poem about why consent is essential in sex
This post was inspired by 1 Corinthians 13:1–8, Paul’s famous passage about love. And now I will show you the
“But if I have not consent…” A short poem about why consent is essential in sex Read Post »
Starlight, The church and consent
45 reasons why the culture behind #ChurchToo fails to understand consent
With the recent trending of the hashtag #ChurchToo, people are sharing their experiences of abuse in the church. Meanwhile, others
45 reasons why the culture behind #ChurchToo fails to understand consent Read Post »
#churchtoo, Abuse dynamics, Firelight, The church and consent, The church and exclusion
Always reforming: 95 statements on hope, sexuality and consent
It is 500 years to the day (well, sort of, if we don’t worry about the shift to the Gregorian
Always reforming: 95 statements on hope, sexuality and consent Read Post »
Sunlight, The church and consent
Modesty 101: modesty is not about clothes, rather glory and context
So… the fabulous Sierra White has asked me to share some thoughts on modesty for her Facebook page Ezer Rising (and
Modesty 101: modesty is not about clothes, rather glory and context Read Post »
Sunlight, The Bible and other studies, The church and consent
Sex and consent: everything I didn’t know when I married
I recently had the privilege of being able to guest post on the blog of Ashley Easter. She asked me
Sex and consent: everything I didn’t know when I married Read Post »
Sunlight, The church and consent
The key to lifelong sex? Get the right advice.
It staggers me sometimes just how much rubbish gets bandied about in popular culture as sex advice. Recently, it was
The key to lifelong sex? Get the right advice. Read Post »
Sunlight, The church and consent
To the evangelical couple considering sex therapy
I recently wrote a post in which I mentioned that my husband and I went for psychosexual therapy (you can
To the evangelical couple considering sex therapy Read Post »
Sunlight, The church and consent
On the receiving end of sex – why it’s not just about giving
Photo credit: Toa Hefitba, Unsplash.com EDIT: this post is aimed at people who feel guilty about being pleasured. If you
On the receiving end of sex – why it’s not just about giving Read Post »
Sunlight, The church and consent
Ruth and Joseph: A closer look at love vs abuse
This post is a writer’s-commentary on a sketch I wrote, based on two Bible stories: Joseph and Potiphar’s wife in
Ruth and Joseph: A closer look at love vs abuse Read Post »
#churchtoo, Firelight, Rape in the Old Testament, The church and consent